Paddysmusings

Are we taking Christmas too far?

2009-12-23T18:47:00.000-08:00

Don't get me wrong. I love Christmas as I'm sure everybody does. Cards are welcome from the people you know but what about the ones you don't. Like Wilson Parking in New Zealand who sent me an e-card this Christmas. Who are they. Does anyone know? I don't and I'm the guy who got the card.

It's Christmas eve - so what are you upto?
Me - just lolling about the way I usually do. Have to fix Christmas lunch which is going to be roast chicken, roast vegetables and a nice bottle of red. It was supposed to be pork sorpotel as well and vindaloo but I think those recipes are a bit beyond my capabilities. A good warrior as Tsun Zhu says knows his weaknesses better than his strengths. I even have a back up plan in case the chicken doesn't turn out right. Cold Storage. They'll be open all Christmas and will have chickens from 10 am onwards - for those who may find themselves in a predicament similar to mine.

Its a dull grey day here in Singapore
And it's going to be like this on Christmas Day too I believe. So if you're in London or Canada no need to envy the sunshine here - there aint going to be any. And no snow either unless you're at Tanglin Mall where they have a snow machine with about 300 screaming kids making you wonder why they do.

Watched this programme about Alexander the Great last night
It was all about his conquest (or attempted) of India. Its funny how different countries interpret events differently. It is true - you see only what you want to. According to the documentary (which I think was quite fair and neutral in its analysis), Alexander gave King Porus the kind of thrashing Father Rufus used to hand out when he was principal at St Andrews in the seventies.

Three quarters of Porus' army was destroyed. Porus had, what most leaders today don't though - the ability to stand tall in defeat and still challenge and refuse to give in to his opponent.

Alexander respected him so much for this, he let him keep his lands though he had won them fair and square in what can be described as a little bit more than a arm wrestle ....the battle of Hydaspes.

Alexander had to turn back though because after Porus he had to confront a myriad different Indian Kings who had put aside their differences and mustered more than 300,000 men to face him. His army was also tired and cold (who wouldn't be if you had to march all the way from Greece to India with a helmet, metal skirt and strange footwear) and had apparently made souvlaki a condition of pressing ahead. Souvlaki couldn't be found anywhere on the continent at the time and so Alexander had to turn back - apparently.

Rainy day or not,Christmas still is Christmas and there's joy to be had.
I plan to fill my cup to the brim with it. I suggest you do the same too.

Merry Christmas

Of boosa, bonfire and beer at Christmas

2009-12-18T23:27:00.000-08:00

It seems like only yesterday that I was with the lads collecting 'boosa' (wood shavings) for the traditional bonfire that we used to light every Christmas after midnight mass in our neighbourhood.

We were fortunate to live by the side of Damian's, one of the city's largest furniture makers.

In return for enduring the hammering of a thousand nails each day, and fumes from varnishes, most of which I am pretty sure were banned in every country except India, they used to allow us to wander through their compound and pick both boosa and any other pieces of unused wood we wanted for our bonfire.

Never mind that we all suffer from migraines today thanks to the incessant pounding of hammers that we had to put up with daily, or that we all breathe with the help of a respirator. We wanted wood for our bonfire at the time - and the important thing was that we got it.

Not as kid friendly as Ikea
The Damian compound was not the best place to be for kids. It wasn't designed for them the way let's just say McDonald's or Ikea is. Being a furniture busines, there were nails everywhere - which may have had some significance at Easter but definitely not at Christmas. We had to make sure we were well protected. So with childhood ingenuity, rather than travel barefoot, as we usually did, we made sure we wore our rubber chappals from Bata or Corona. The nails could still shoot through but the chances were a lot less and we were usually able to return relatively unscathed with enough wood for our fire.

Bonfires aren't supposed to be lit until well after midnight
Or so we thought anyway.

Our bonfire would only be lit only after everyone returned from midnight mass. You could hear mass at the Chapel at Bandstand or at St Andrews which was our main church.

The problem with St Andrews was the sermons. They were as long as the gown of a bride and usually only half as interesting. The priests there were clearly as garrulous as me - with skills in 'precis' that were just as bad. So as kids we always went to the chapel instead where brevity was encouraged and our service finished at least 45 minutes before everybody elses.

After service is when it all began

What we would do after mass is congregate in our compound where everyone would wish each other a merry Christmas. It was the one time in the year that neighbours would set aside squabbles (and there was no shortage of them) - even if only because they felt they were duty bound by God to do so.

Then we would make our way to the bonfire where the match would be struck.

The bonfire was actually more than one
It was usually also accompanied by coffee and sandwiches made by one of the more generous aunties of the neighbourhood (mostly my mom) that tasted simply divine at that time of the night.

The coffee used was never Nescafe but MR which was much nicer and always seemed to taste better.

The coffee was meant to keep the chill from our bones. Though quite frankly as kids we thought the beer, rum and cigarettes we'd light up after mass did a much better job at that.

Beer and cigarettes cost money - so Christmas meant we had to be resourceful

And as kids we were. Besides saving our allowances for the big day, we would undertake a number of activities that at this point I think could best be described as 'entrepreneurial.'

We would sell old newspapers for example that were lying around the house. The going rate at the time was 5 rupees per kg (but it's probably gone up by now in case you're considering the option this Christmas - like I am!).

We would also sell old brass taps that had been replaced and were due to be thrown away. These got you quite a good deal too, often ending up back in your house refurbished depending on which plumber you got to do the job.

Finally when all options seemed exhausted you could always count on the last one - and that's quickly typing up a fake raffle form to take it around to the neighbours to make a donation in the true spirit of the season.

No matter what we did, the money always came in the end
And I think there was a reason for that - "it was Christmas."

Have a great Christmas.

Christmas is the best time of the year - is this why?

2009-12-05T17:23:00.000-08:00

It's coming up to Christmas, one of the best times of the year - especially if you're a kid - or vagrant. Kid is understandable, why vagrant? Well it's one if the few times in the year you get to eat - so that's got to be something to look forward to.

Christmas brings out the best side of us all - the one that's big, generous and magnanimous. The one we keep securely in check at all other times of the year. Because if we didn't, we'd be broke, poor and unable be able to celebrate on Christmas day itself - which would be a real pity.

I don't know about your Christmases but I can tell you a thing or two about mine.

The big thing about Christmas in a Catholic family in India (more specifically Bandra) is the build up - not so much the day itself.

It all starts around the first week of December when everyone starts planning madly. What will we have on the table this Christmas (as if it changes every year!) is the first question. Fact is, this Christmas, like all other Christmases what we will have on the table is chicken curry (two or three birds instead of just one depending on how many people are coming), pork sorpotel (a fiery goan or mangalorean pork dish), pork vindaloo (green or red masala can be used), tongue (pressure cooked and then cut into fine slices that melt in your mouth), green salad or fish salad (usually shaped into a fish as well - creativity is alive this time of the year!), pulao (basmati because the occasion is special), raita maybe, fughaiyas (if you're East Indian - a bread like special) and if a rich relative from overseas is visiting - roast suckling pig - complete with apple in its mouth.

Usually Christmas is celebrated at one relative's house. The relative that's chosen is the one who can cook the best - the day is too important to be left in the hands of a novice. For as long as I can remember, Christmas was always celebrated at my house. The reason was my mother - one of the most generous women ever - the family could count on her to put on a feast and in 24 years of liviing at home I've never seen her disappoint.

In the first week of December what also starts to be planned are the Christmas sweets. No Catholic home is complete without them - just like they aren't without an altar in the living room.

Before mum gets to the sweets though there is something more important she has to plan - the Christmas cake. This is when all the sultanas, nuts and raisins her brother carried for her all the way from the US are brought out form the back of the cupboard where they have been carfefully stored for this very special day.

A traditional Christmas cake (and God only knows why we make one given it is a Brit, not an Indian tradition), takes about a month to make. First the batter is created and the nuts, sultanas and raisins folded in. The cake is then baked (usually in early December if not before), given a soak in brandy and then packed away. Every week the cake is given another brandy soak and packed away again. "It's to keep it moist" insist the men I've spoken to on this subject. "Yeah right" as a famous beer advert in New Zealand says.

Once the cake was done, it was time to get down to the sweets. Those were the ones I had my eye on as a kid! The usual sweets made in our house were milk creams (my favourites), sojee toffee (a pink diamond shaped sweet that was great too), kul kuls (which I never touched - too commonplace), marzipans (another key favourite) and neowries (a sweet savoury that again brought out the fussy side in me).

The sweets were made for visitors and for eating by the family closer to Christmas. To ensure they lasted, they would have to be hidden in all sorts of places. Often the hiding places would need to be changed regularly to avoid their chances of being found. It was very Bin Ladenish - even in those times.

The fun part of the sweets was scraping the hundi's in which they were made. There were always plenty of scrapings left behind (my mum would make sure of this) and my sister and I would fight for the right to the hundi.We usually got one each - and a stomach ache after too - given the amount of sugar we had consumed by the end of the process!

Christmas cake, christmas sweets and a full Christmas menu. That's enough for one post I think. Next week I'll write about the other preparations we make for Christmas, the clothes, the tailors and the events that occur between them (and there are a great many!). So watch out for that.

Games people play - and other random thoughts for the weekend

2009-12-05T07:03:00.000-08:00

If the world has a food shortage - it's about to come to an end. Farmville is officially the most popular game on Facebook with over 60 million users who are busy planting and harvesting everything from beetroots to pumpkins, strawberries and squash.

What makes Farmville so popular I think is its appeal to a nature that is basic in us all (and that's to farm).

At some level, we all want to tend and till the land. It would be an unmitigated disaster if some of us were allowed to no doubt but there's little damage a small indulgence at a virtual level can lead to - which indeed is what Farmville is all about.

I have a farm on Farmville and I must say I find the experience of planting and harvesting strangely satisfying. If you haven't tried it you must. You will totally enjoy yourself though I must warn you it can be slightly addictive.

The blood diet - now with a restaurant to match
Some time back I wrote about the blood diet. A few days ago, I was knowledgeably informed that there is now a restaurant in Singapore dedicated to it. I haven't tried it yet but I fully intend to.

To those I've spooked, there is nothing vampirish about the blood diet and you don't need to travel to Translyvania to enjoy it. The blood diet is simply a food movement that says there are foods that are good for you (and foods that are bad) as a result of the blood group you belong to (A+, B+ or O).

I am an A+ for example so whats good for me is grain, bread, vegetables....but not tea, meat, chicken, eggs, wine or beer. Damn!

I've tried the diet and testify to its ability to make you feel 100%.More about it you an read here - http://www.drlam.com/blood_type_diet/

The perfect chicken curry
I know it's the one made by someone else - while you're sipping a wine or beer and relaxing watching TV! But if that option is not available to you - all is still not lost.

My sister is in Singapore this weekend and she taught me how to make a perfect chicken curry.

It all starts (and this is my contribution not hers) with a perfect chicken. To me this is either Kampong or free range - I wouldn't eat anything else.

The reason Kampong or free range chickens are so good is they are allowed to scratch around in the dirt for their own food. This simple daily exercise makes them leaner and a lot more muscular than the factory farm produced birds.

Muscle is what gives meat taste and that's why these birds taste so much better and are so much healthier for you than the factory produced ones!

So, assuming you've got the right chicken - let's put the pot on the fire.

Step one - put some oil into a pan (I use olive oil but I believe any oil is good as long as you don't heat it too much or reuse the oil. Doing so releases transfats which, well...you know all about I'm sure).

To the heated oil, ad a chopped onion, some cloves, a stick of cinnamon, some star anise and gently fry until golden brown. Add a green chilli for taste, a teaspoon of jeera powder, 1/2 a teaspoon of coriander powder, cummin powder and a dash of tumeric. Also add finely sliced ginger and garlic and stir til everything is nice and golden brown.

While you're doing this, you're hopefully de-boned and taken the skin of your chicken which has generously given up its life for you. Squeeze a lemon and rub some salt onto the bird. Then, drop it into the pan and gently stir through the onions and spices you already have on the fire. As the mixture gathers intensity, add three dollops of yoghurt to it - you can also alternate this recipe with coconut milk too which will give you a slightly different taste and flavour.

Add a bit of water so the chicken won't stick, you can also add a 1/2 teaspoon of sugar for a bit of extra zest, cover and let the chicken simmer on a super slow fire for about 10 minutes.

Once done, garnish with chopped coriander or a pinch of garam masala. Enjoy - with family and friends.

So this is what Diwali is all about

2009-10-18T04:18:00.000-07:00

I spent Diwali in Delhi and what a great experience it proved to be.

We woke up in the morning, took a bath and after wishing everyone a happy Diwali sat down to a sumptuous breakfast of Poori Aloo followed by Chai made the Punjabi way.If you don’t make your tea the Punjabi way I strongly suggest you do. It will bring a new sense of meaning and upliftment to your life - as it did to mine.

The Poori Aloo was fantastic. The Poori’s kept arriving the way immigrants do at big cities like Delhi and Mumbai. Non stop! I would have eaten at least 10 to 15 puris alone and everyone else would have done the same.

Accompanying the Poori Aloo was this wonderful red peppery tomato dish with onion seeds in it. It was the first time I had tasted a dish like this and it was sheer bliss. Every meal in Delhi, come to think of it was!

After breakfast, we chatted for a while, ate some dry fruits and mithai (as you do) and then retired for a well earned snooze. It was going to be a long evening and we had to make sure we were well rested for it.

At about 6, we ventured downstairs once again. After a final dash to distribute more sweets and to buy some Muthi – a deep friend flatbread of sorts we prepared for the evening Pooja – the predecessor to the evening’s fireworks.

I didn’t understand much of the Pooja but I realised you don’t have to to appreciate its beauty or relevance to life. As a ritual it simply refocuses us on the things that matter - family for instance.

What I like about Hinduism is that it is tolerant and unoppressive. Hinduism doesn’t ask you to sacrifice much – and the emphasis is on life in this world as well the next.

The Pooja complete we sit down to another incredible meal – of a pulao type rice with all sorts of exotic Indian spices in it plus two forms of lentil and a paneer cooked in tomatoes, onions and spices. All accompanied by that other Punjabi staple – paratha!

Diwali is a totally vegetarian affair and no alcohol is consumed in this day as a tribute to its significance. People make up for this abstinence however with parties the day before – and after! Diwali parties start at 12 midnight and then anything goes – scotch, beer, vodka the lot – the party ends at 6 am the next morning with a breakfast cooked by the host.

I decided to give the parties a skip. Tired out by the day’s festivities I stayed home and watched a movie with the wife. We chose the Godfather which was brilliant as it always is and stayed up till 2.30 am.

We then went to bed and got some sleep. With the firecrackers subsiding we were finally able to.

Singapore-Delhi-Singapore - Via Air India

2009-10-10T05:41:00.000-07:00

I flew Air India from Singapore to Delhi. A week after I bought my ticket I read a slightly alarming news article. No it wasn’t the one about Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston potentially getting together again. It was much worse. It was about airline pilots at Air India going on strike and about 50% of all flights being canceled.

Naturally it was with a bit of trepidation that I approached my departure date. Would there even be a plane on the tarmac? Luckily there was - and I made my date with Delhi without a hitch.

The flight was interesting and started in the most promising manner possible – with only 3 people ahead of me at the check-in counter. That’s the wonderful thing about flying an airline nobody else wants to. They treat you like you’re the only customer in the world which in Air India’s case you’re not too far off from being. Or so, I felt at least!

I found the announcements to board the aircraft quite interesting. “Business class passengers and those with infants please board first” said the ground stewardess loudly over the microphone. “Other passengers”, she admonished sternly, “please stay in your seats!”

I can see why she was so stern about this. In India, public transport very rarely waits for passengers to board. The drivers are always in one flipping hurry and take off whenever they feel like. This, I think, has trained Indians to psychologically believe that all forms of transport secretly conspire against them and take great pleasure in leaving before they’ve had a chance to board. This feeling – though purely psychological and without basis - invariably rises to the surface at airports as well. So when a boarding call is made, the Indian contingent rush to the gate like Salman Khan is about to walk through it. It’s okay – every one will get a seat. This is an airline not the BEST after all.

AI on economy drive
Air India I believe is not doing very well financially. I read a report in the newspaper a few days ago where the Finance Minister of India said the airline would need a cash injection of $620 million to stay afloat. He suggested the airline go on an austerity drive.

He’ll be pleased to know it has. When you ask for a glass of orange juice on Air India today, you’ll find they’ll give you a cup with less than a third of juice in it! That’s what happened to me. I told the stewardess why bother to even pour me such a small quantity of juice. By the time she hands it to me it will have evaporated thanks to humidity. Is the cup half empty or half full? Neither. The real question is whether it’s 1/3 empty or 1/3 full. AI – being all very original once again.

Travel back in time

I thought all airlines used air bridges these days. Air India doesn’t. They take you back in time, give you a bit of nostalgia when you land in Delhi. The aircraft door opens and lo and behold you find an airline bus waiting for you on the tarmac (yes just like the old days). Passengers cram into it and are taken to the airport departure lounge. It’s not a bad experience. Except that if you aren’t one of the first 40 passengers you have to wait for the second bus which from what I could see could take a while.

All in all – no complaints
The flight was good. It took off, it landed, the food was nice (you could choose between chicken, mutton and fish) – and the staff pleasant. End of day what more can you really ask off from an airline. Except, I’m tempted to say, being a fellow with rather long legs…a bit more space between the seats?

Life is full of surprises - including the ones you give yourself while cooking

2009-10-03T00:41:00.000-07:00

I did a bit of cooking today - tried my hand at some lentils, okra and aubergine (dal, bhindi and baigan as it’s called it in India).

I must admit I took myself completely by surprise. The dal was simply smashing – better than any restaurant I’ve been to – even the ones at Little India. How did I do it?

First I took a large onion, chopped it as finely as possible – vertically and then horizontally across. I heated a pan with olive oil in it, put in a generous heap of chopped garlic from a bottle - very generous - about two tablespoons; all of course while I had the dal in a saucepan of water – on the boil at the same time.

A tip – when you boil a lentil you get this white stuff at the top…skim it off with a spoon and throw it away – it keeps the flavour nice and clean.

After adding the garlic, I added a generous amount of chopped ginger as well, and stir fried it around on a medium flame. I understood the role that onions and garlic play in taste when I was actually cooking up an Italian pasta dish the other day which I just had to do after watching the Goodfellas with Joe Pesci and De Niro.

It was so amazing (both the movies and the pasta) it made me realise that at the heart of all great flavour is the onion, garlic and ginger! But you have to cook them right.

After adding the ginger, I added some jeera. It took me a while to figure out which packet had fennel in it and which one had jeera - ultimately I let my nose decide. And luckily it didn't let me down.

I also added a ½ teaspoon of garam masala to the pan. Garam masala is such a fragrant spice, I actually prefer its scent to anything produced by Chanel, Lagerfeld or YSL. Bad news if you’re sitting beside me but good news if you’re a guest to one of my dinners.

After the garam masal I realised I wanted some colour in my dish. So, although it wasn’t Holi yet, I added some tumeric. Tumeric is a great spice. Besides being good for you, it adds a lovely yellow colour that looks just amazing on your table.

I stir fried all of this, taking care to roast the spices and the onions. Roasting the spices and onions is key to Indian cooking; it took me years to get this (but then again it takes me years to get anything!). Once I did however, I never looked back. The roasting releases the flavour so when you add the ingredients – the meat, fish or veg it’s like Heidi Klum just met Seal The impact is truly momentous.

After the roasting, I added the dal which is now nicely soft and stir fried it all together. To garnish I add some lemon juice and some finely chopped – bruised - coriander. Why do I bruise my coriander - brute that I am? It releases the flavour.

It also reminds me of one of my favourite lines from Herrick – “a flower must be bruised in order to give off its perfume.” He was of course alluding to the fact that a woman feelings must be injured before her greatness and strength of character can truly shine through.

It‘s a line by Herrick by the way not me – so don’t look like I have issues. I don’t. But I can forgive you for believing Herrick does!

The garnish is added - the dish is ready. I have boiled some choice basmatic rice – the longest grains ever as an accompaniment (basmati btw is the only rice that is medium GI if you're into that kind of stuff). The rice comes from Pakistan not India. Sorry I'll try and ensure it's from our side of the border next time.

What I've also done is made some baigan and bhindi which I have stir fried in a masala sent to me by my mother. How red the dish is - almost like a bride who has seen her groom for the first time! The beauty of chilli's from Kashmir - no other chilli's comes even close to them.

I sit down and eat. There is an explosion of flavours in my mouth. For once the world has come together nicely - even if it's only on my palette!

Flights of fancy

2009-10-02T19:26:00.000-07:00

Flew to KL on Wednesday - was booked on a 7am flight which I predictably missed. SIA was kind enough to put me on the next flight at 8.30.

Ever noticed how powerful airline ground-staff suddenly look when you miss a flight? Suddenly instead of them doing their best to smile – you are. Well if you want them to give you the next available seat that is.

Have you ever flown business class? I was upgraded once on SIA. No it wasn’t because they realised who I was (though that would have been nice). They were just low on non-veg meals in economy so to make amends upgraded me.

Space the final frontier
The thing that gets me about airlines is how miserly they are with space between seats. I think there is a huge opportunity to create a new class – one in between economy and first – where the only benefit is a few more inches between you and the guy ahead. I reckon sales would really take off (no pun intended).

Flight between KL and Singapore
It’s so short I wonder why airlines bother with things like tea and coffee for example. One minute they hand you your cup, the next they ask for it back. I think to save time they should just go around the aircraft with their trolleys, hand people their coffee and as they reach for it – take it back and throw it away! That’s the only way they’ll be able to complete the service in the time it takes to get to KL or back.

A little appreciation goes a long way
Although it doesn't seem like it, I do appreciate the stuff airlines do to make our journey more comfortable. Like ensuring seats with minimal space between them, keeping the number of toilets to an average of 1 per every 40 people and in the case of Air India guaranteeing a strike during every peak travel period like Diwali this year for example!

I am being overly critical.

There are some airlines that are just outstanding. Singapore Airlines is one. Jet Airways is another. I flew Jet a few months ago to Mumbai and they were very special indeed.

They were as good as SIA – and 50% cheaper. Their food was excellent, entertainment not bad at all and service pleasant and efficient.

SIA is very good too – particularly in the long haul sector. The entertainment choices are mind boggling. You’ll have to fly for a month before you go through all of them!

Speaking of flying, I’ll be off to Phuket on Monday
Attending the iMedia conference there - should be interesting. Then it’s off to Delhi for me to celebrate Diwali. Then back to some more serious work in Singapore. Until then, have fun. I know I will.

Prince of Wales embarks on worthwhile mission – finally

2009-09-18T20:43:00.000-07:00

He’s been better known for hunting wild animals than saving them but it looks like the Prince of Wales has turned over a new leaf (the foxes will breathe a sigh of relief).

He recently launched a campaign to save the rainforests – and everything in it.

The Prince makes a good point – though not a unique one - our future is inextricably linked to that of the rainforest.

He’s managed to recruit some of the world’s best known and best loved faces for the 1 minute commercial that features Daniel Craig, Pele, Robbin Williams, Harrison Ford, Prince William and Harry.

It’s a good campaign for a good cause. Finally the Prince of Wales is making a difference. We all knew he had it in him to and much welcome his initiative.

See the commercial here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=boEDMVNAPk4

The Power of language
It’s not what we say but how we say it that’s often all the difference. One person who’s always made his point in an interesting way is Oscar Wild.

I was just reading a page of his quotations and he had such beauties in there – felt compelled to share:

1.Any one who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination (ahem!)
2.Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative (hear hear)
3.Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable we have to alter it every six months
4.One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards
5.It is a sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information

On that point he clearly hasn’t read my blog! Have a great Saturday.

The joy of leaving the office at 5 – or not being able to

2009-09-18T11:08:00.000-07:00

Discovered there is something positive about not being able to leave the office at 5 after all – you don’t get stuck in massive traffic jams like the one I was in today.

Where was everyone going? I don’t know – but clearly somewhere. The road from Cantonment to Holland was totally jammed. It took me over an hour to get home. Thank goodness for computers and mobile internet access.

It’s a long weekend and by God we need one
What do I plan to do – nothing! In a week I’ll be going to Phuket to the imedia conference. That should be fun. The agenda is interesting - the possibility of snorkelling too.

What makes us happy?
I’ve realised its memories and friends. I had plenty of both today as I caught up with friends my wife and I worked with before. Old times are special times and the one thing they never lose is their relevance or importance.

Do you wear a vest?
My mum always insisted I wear one. Especially in winter when temperatures in Mumbai used to touch a bone chilling 23 degrees!

Old habits are hard to get away from – even when people make fun of them (did I just see a few people turn red). Vests are here to stay – for me at least. Critics take note.

Bar Bar Bukit Timah
This is a find. It’s a little place that’s halfway between a restaurant and a hawker centre. Here you can find a Leffe Blonde, Little Creatures ale, San Miguel or Heineken – reasonably priced at $7 or $8.

You can also find great Indian food – prata, dhal, rice and roti.
Be early, the kitchen shuts at 10 (a bit odd for Singapore), beer service halts at 12 though you can sit and carry on chatting until the wee hours of the morning. And that's not hard to do when the company is right.

We had some Tarka Dhal, Butter Chicken, Bhaigan Masala and Roti - and it was great. The rice was finished as we ordered at around 10 itself. But we managed to get some from the Thai food stall thanks to some good thinking from one of our friends. All in all all a very good evening and an even better eaterie find.

Who we are and who we thought we would be
I’ll be honest. When I was young I thought I would be a famous singer – I turned out to be a bathroom one instead.

Isn’t it funny how dreams turn out? Often not the way you thought they would when you were asleep.

Speaking of bathroom singers, who remembers Karen Lunel and the Liril ad? Ok everybody reading this blog!? Wasn’t the ad just brilliant – “la la la la la….la la la la…la la la …!

I started my career at Lintas as a writer. And reading the Lintas Goden Book came across the strategy for the Liril brand.

“Indian women apparently fantasize in the bath. It’s the only place they get the privacy they need to do so. The ad tapped into that insight to create a fantasy of a girl under a waterfall to bring to life the experience Liril as a soap offered.”

Love the ad, love the brand.

The thing about advertising in India
People are still involved with it. Ads are like theatre – people look forward to it. When I was a kid I used to switch on the TV every night at 9 pm before Chayageet or the other popular programmes – just to watch the ads. When the ads were finished (and there were a good 10 minutes of them!) and the main programme began I’d switch the TV off. But that was just me – I’m sure a lot of people weren’t quite so insane.

2 am on a Friday. I’m up – but honestly have no right to be. Its been a big week. Time to take some of its impact off. Have a good night and we’ll talk tomorrow.

Should this man be fired?

2009-09-16T09:31:00.000-07:00

For those who don’t know him, he is Australian Kyle Sandilands – radio DJ. Kyle was recently under fire for his comments on Australian actress Magda Szubanski – who said she was on a diet and is best known for her role on Kath and Kim.

His comment “Magda could lose weight by placing herself in a Nazi concentration camp.”

Yes he made a joke about Magda Szubanski (a great actor if I may add!). Is that politically incorrect - enough to warrant a sacking; I don’t think so.

People like Kyle are stand up comedians. They are paid to make light of life – to say things that are not always politically correct.

The Jewish community is up in arms – justifiably so? Not sure. The holocaust was bad yes but it happened at a time too far back for most of us to even remember. To truly make younger generations understand the holocaust one would have to re-enact it - and that - in most people's views I'm sure - would just be a bad idea.

What we need to do - while we enjoy the work of comedians - is realise we need to give them a bit of berth. They make light of life, they make us laugh - they make us see things in a different way – not always the right way! And sure they may sometimes over step the line. Should they be fired for that? I don’t think so. At some point all of us do things we wish – the next day – we hadn’t! Is tomorrow going to be one of those days for me – watch this space!

There is always a thin line between humour and offence. It’s a dangerous line – almost like the one between smoking and crack. But you have to walk it if you’re in the comedy business. You need material – and this is where you get it from.

Back to the question – should this man be fired? My answer is no. What’s yours?

Power of the Press and Fear as a Tool to Influence

2009-09-13T00:16:00.000-07:00

I wonder if at least half the world’s problems were created by the Press. The other half of course we know were created by US foreign policy!

I mean look at this news headline from AAP which was featured on the front page of Yahoo.com.au - ‘thousands march against Obama.’

About 20,000 people took part in this rally against the President because they were afraid he was making America a socialist state (good propaganda I must say - no better way to topple an American President than to accuse him of being a socialist!).

The fact is though, 20,000 people are about 0.005% of the total US population – a protest worthy of international headlines - I don’t think so.

It’s clearly a political stunt motivated by conservatives – and the Press is using it in a sensationalist way to drive circulation and readership – as it often does.

I mean we all know (or some of us do anyway) how the Press operates. People are employed to write news stories and others employed to write just the headlines to ensure articles catch people’s eyes. Nothing wrong with that, but when a non-issue is made an issue I think the Press needs to hold a mirror to itself and assess the morality of its position.

The way to rouse the masses is clearly through fear
The reason organisers managed to get 20,000 people to attend their Obama protest march was fear. In this case, a trivial one – higher taxes.

Throughout history however Machavellians have used fear as an emotion to get people to do what under normal circumstances they never would never have.

Hitler is a good example of that. In reality I doubt whether he actually hated the Jewish people. He had no reason to. Hitler and the Nazi’s were opportunistic demagogues however. Scholars believe (and this is off Wiki Answers) that they spread fear about the Jews among the German people and used the hatred they fomented to unify the people, make them believe they had a common enemy they needed to fight against. They even used propaganda like saying the bankers who arranged the Treaty of Versailles were Jewish - to achieve their ends.

Rwanda - another example of how fear can be used to pit people against people
1994 saw the worst genocide in modern times. 800,000 Tutsi’s killed by the majority Hutu’s. For those who have seen the movie Hotel Rwanda, or read about the issue on the web the strategy of the Hutu’s was clear. They used the airwaves – radio and TV – to instil fear among Hutus making them believe the Tutsi’s were Supremists after the survival of their own race only – even if at the cost of the Hutu race.
They incited violence and killing of the Tutsi’s to the effect that 20% of the Tutsi population was wiped out!

The world is not a good place – how can we make it a better one?
The biggest problem we face in the world today is machavellian leaders who use fear to their advantage. I don’t think there will ever be a shortage of machavellians in society. History disproves that fact. What’s the solution then for our world in the future then?

I think it can only be resistance to the tools evil leaders use to incite hatred. The predominantly used tool is fear. And if you and I can overcome it – our world indeed will be a better place!

I have an idea...MC

2009-09-07T08:47:00.000-07:00

Monday. Went into work today thinking taking an MC would be so much more fun. MC, by the way for readers who aren’t in Singapore, stands for Medical Certificate (in essence a sickie).

MC is as uniquely Singaporean as fish head curry. It’s usually taken on a Monday or when an individual feels the organisation has been working him (or her) just a wee bit too hard (not that any organisation in Singapore would even think of doing so of course!).

The truth is, Singaporeans get less leave than any other country in the world. Australia: annual leave: 4 weeks; Singapore: 2 weeks. MC is a way to make up for the injustice.

The three best things about Singapore I've concluded – Lee Kuan Yew, black pepper crab and MC – though not necessarily in that specific an order.

Amazing stat
I read a research recently that looked at what Singaporeans preferred to do during their spare time. About 23% said “work!”

Chivalrous man gives seat to woman and baby
Singaporeans are a chivalrous lot as I found out today as I boarded a train to return home from work. One of the passengers who I happen to know very rarely gets a seat during peaks hours not only got one today but also had the good grace to surrender it to a young mum with a 6 month old baby. May this young man (well not so young any more) be blessed both in this life and the ones to come!

Talking about seats have you noticed the lengths some people will go to avoid giving them up? Here’s the modus operandi. Pregnant woman or woman with 6 month old child enters bus. Young strong male has secured a seat and only his Stop is going to get him out of it.

What does he do? Close his eyes and pretend to be asleep of course. If he’s a pro he goes a step further. He lets out the occasional snore so perfect, so practised you almost tip toe past to avoid disturbing him.

Even the heavily pregnant woman is on edge as she passes him by – as she should!

You got a hold on me…
I think to myself as I gaze at the box of Indian mithai sitting in the fridge.

I bought the mithai the night previous from Mustafa. It’s sold on level 2 – if you’re interested. This one is made of pistachio and almonds; the taste – truly heavenly.

My favourite mithai – Kaju Kathli or “diamond sweet” as we used to call it when I was growing up. It’s made from cashew nuts and comes wrapped in edible silver. Ang Mo’s ask silly questions like “can I eat the silver” – of course you can! It won’t kill you – it’s the sugar and ghee that will!

Ever watched the programme “Chopped” on TV?
I think what makes it so interesting is the fact that all the chefs featured are so bad. On today's show one of the chef's even served the judges raw chicken. I mean how do you get onto a TV show with culinary skills like that? I thought I was poor in the kitchen but I’ll tell you what after watching the contestants, my ambition is a Michelin star! In fact I’ll stop at nothing short of that.

It’s nearly midnight and tomorrow’s another day. I’m going to get some sleep. I need it! So adios.
cheers

Saturday - why it's better than Sunday, Blackbery Storm and the HDFC fair

2009-09-04T20:32:00.000-07:00

It’s Saturday and have you noticed how it always feels better than Sunday? I’ve often wondered why. I think it’s because on Saturday we’ve got a day off – and one more to look forward too. Sure, Sunday is a holiday too. But where it’s placed in the week is unfortunate – being followed by Monday automatically means that it could never win the contest for being best day of the week.

Don’t forget Monday the 21st is a holiday in Singapore for Hari Raya. Don’t anyone rock into the office unwittingly. You’ll be caught on office security cameras across the island and the video will be posted on YouTube for everyone to comment on (so I’ve heard). The world is a dangerous place today not because of 9/11 but because of the number of cameras and places to post videos and pictures around!

New Blackberry – it will take the world by anything but Storm
I dropped my old Blackberry Curve last week (though insurance and Pauline our office manager don’t know that:))and smashed the little ball on the front. This week I got a new Blackberry Storm as a replacement.

Does God punish those who don’t tell the truth (like saying honestly I dropped my phone and that’s why it doesn’t work?). Yes – most definitely!

The Storm is a lovely phone - until you start to use it – as it took me about 20 seconds to realise.

For a start, the touch screen key pad is impossible to use. It’s so small, and impractical for even moderately large male thumbs, that the e-mails you type in invariably sound somthumg like thus. U’m Nat jokhng. Damn got to type it out all over again!

The second problem with the Storm (particularly for me) is its glass front. I drop my Blackberry that way George Clooney drops girlfriends. So a large glass front panel is not a good idea at all. I haven’t been able to find a case for the Storm that I think is secure enough to protect it yet. The only solution that I can see at this point…..bubble wrap.

Blackberry trick – finding unread e-mails
You know how often you don’t open an email and then you’ll get another and another and before long you won’t be able to find the unread e-mail? Well it happens to me all the time. Last evening for example I had something like 25 unread e-mails but I couldn’t find them on my phone because they were embedded so deep inside.

What was I to in a situation like this? Speak to the guru of course – Eugene our tech director. I asked him if the blackberry come with a “view unread” function. He was sure it did and went away to investigate the phone and its functions on the Internet. He came back an hour later, machine gun in hand (he takes failure very seriously). Luckily the machine gun was a toy one that squirted water not bullets. His conclusion - there was no “view unread” function.

However….there was a way to go straight to your unread e-mails. What you have to do is bring up the key pad and type the letter “U”. It will take you straight to your unread emails one at a time.

I feel so much better now knowing that all my e-mails have been read. It’s the simple things in life that are important to me - clearly.

HDFC housing fair – Meritus Meridien Orchard road today
If you’re looking to buy a home (it has to be in India) then you should rock down to the HDFC housing fair. It’s on today until 8 pm (not sure what time it starts) and is at the Meridien Meritus Hotel at Orchard road.

At the fair you’ll be able to meet developers (they’re quite lively company I’ve been told) and also HDFC officers who can advise you on loan options available to you.

I might rock down to have a look so if you’re down there I’ll see you there.

Where did I find out about the HDFC housing fair? The office toilet. Someone is always leaving copies of The New Paper around. Bless them. Where would I be today without them?

Probably Jones the Grocer sipping a flat white instead!

Have a neat Saturday.

Thursday in Singapore and other key connnective experiences

2009-09-03T08:44:00.000-07:00

Figured the PC to LCD connection - finally
Didn't realise I had a storage device sitting at home that Anu had bought when our Mac was giving trouble. Now that the Mac's been repaired, I realised..hmmm...could use the storage device to store movies...TV shows and God knows what else.

Got a friend to transfer some of his content over to me. Small problem. I couldn't get the device to play. Problem 1 - storage disk formatted for Mac - Eugene our tech wiz at work fixes that for me. Problem 2 - how do I connect a laptop to a PC? I try my HDMI cable (realise computer doesn't have one). Try a USB cable ...find out I don't possess one. Finally ask PariSilk what's the best solution - SVGA I find out. I get the picture on the TV screen after restarting the computer - but no sound. Dig around for the user manual, find it carefully hidden away by the maid in the TV box in the store room an hour later (I'll be giving her tenure!) and discover the sound jack is a stereo one located near the Bravia SVGA terminal.

It's a stereo to stereo jack that I need. I haven't got one. Decide to pick one up from PariSilk the next day. 11.50 pm - I'm still at work...the folks at Pari Silk unfortunately - aren't! The purchase will have to wait until tomorrow. Damn. It's really cool watching web content or a movie on an LCD TV screen rather than your computer screen. The colours are so much more vivid and bright.

Lunch today
Was at Thevasia (not sure I got that right) at Hougang after my client meeting at NTUC FairPrice. Meeting went well, the digital boys (euge, holger and I)decided to get some Prata as a reward and we did. This place - my tech director - Euge - swore served the best Prata in town (I've heard the same thing from about 5 Singaporeans already btw and they've all named different places!).

This was good though I'd have to say. You could eat the rice by itself. It was so tasty. Think it was the ghee the rice was smothered in. Sure my arteries are closing in...but they have to at some time right? In Singapore...one has little choice - but to get used to it!

POI and OCI
Two important things I realised today - I could apply for a Person of Indian Origin status in India or an Overseas Citizen of India. My sister just did and received her OCI. The benefit - you can hold property in the country. You still have to pay for it though. Damn...must always remember to read the fine print!

Mumbai a connective experience
This last trip to Mumbai has been a connective experience for me in many ways. Having been away for so long (15 years)I think I forgot who I was or where I came from (easy when there were so many places - mumbai, sydney, wellington and singapore!). The trip to Mumbai proved a reminder - and an opportune one. I connected with the people I knew and grew up with. The experience was an intense one and a great one - one I wouldn't exchange for anything else in the world! execpt maybe...a chance to visit Mumbai again...for a few days..or maybe weeks? What say you...

Talk soon.

pat

Mumbai day 3 - from singapore

2009-09-02T07:42:00.000-07:00

My 3rd day in Mumbai was quite uneventful. Mainly because I was quite hung over and spent it largely in bed. Next time I'll have to plan a trip that's a bit longer. Still I was in for a few surprises - all pleasant ones - as I wandered about the airport waiting for my flight back to Singapore.

Mumbai airport
Mumbai airport is an ugly ducklng that has turned into a swan.

Although it took me 10 minutes to get into the airport thanks to a largely inept group of security personnel checking passports at the entrance, once I was inside the airport the experience was great.

The airport now has all the world's top designer brands (so your relatives no longer have an excuse to ask you to buy it for them when you return for a holiday!) but even more importantly some of the best food in any airport.

There's Indian, Indian Chinese (Mumbaikars will know what I'm talking about) and a host of other cuisines (and I use the term to include KFC and US Pizza which strangely enough also sells samosas!).

Coffee shops abound - there's one every few yards and even Singapore's Coffee Bean chain has an outlet here.

I wanted to try the veg thali but there was a long queue at the Indian place. One of the airlines was giving away a free meal with its tickets. So I was quite annoyed with that. Settled for fish manchurian and fried rice instead. That wasn't too bad. A bit spicy thanks to the big thick Kashmiri red chilli that I found - feeling a bit like Columbus - in the gravy. But hey no complaints - I love Indian Chinese - as I'm sure anyone who's tasted it does too.

Blood diet
Also picked up a really interesting book at the airport - the Blood Diet. This is a very interesting read. According to the author we can trace our genetic make up to our blood type which could be A, B, AB or O. What he says is that different diets work for different blood types. I am an A for example so according to the book have a delicate stomach (can't disagree with that). For me tomatoes are out (they irritate the stomach lining) as are oranges and pepper. What's in is coffee (not tea), grapefruit, fish, aduki beans (not rajma or chickpeas) and grain.

I've tried the diet - it works. It could be the placebo effect but I've never felt this good before. Or is what I'm experiencing just the high of returning home after a holiday?!Not sure yet.

11.53 pm - time to go to bed I think
Tomorrow is another big day at work...a client meeting at 10.30. Must get my 8 hours of beauty sleep. I know what you're going to say next...I need it...I agree. So goodnight until my next post.

cheers

Mumbai day 2 - I could live here you know...

2009-08-28T22:37:00.000-07:00

Everything I touch, see or do in Mumbai brings back memories. And how fundamental are to these to helping us understand the richness of the lives we've lived.

Tea in India
Have you noticed how much sweeter and nicer tea in India tastes compared to anywhere else in the world? Is it the way we boil the leaves, is it the stainless vessels we use, the fact that we tend not to use tea bags but tea leaves? Or is it a special ingredient the milkman puts in as he dilutes the bottle with 1/3 water (as we've all known he's done for ages) before he leaves it on your window sill? Wish I had an answer to that - does anybody else?

Multi-purpose country, multi purpose products
Was out for a walk at Bandstand today, noticed a unused sewage pipe with man sleeping inside. Everything in India has a purpose - and then another one. It's not a bad thing - it just takes a bit of getting used to once again when you've been away for a while.

Kolis stay true to profession - thank goodness!
Small little boats dot the horizon of the arabian sea. They belong to the koli's of Chimbai and have done so for as long as I can remember.

In a world that's changed the Koli's haven't. They've stayed true to the sea as they have for hundreds of years. Thank goodness - I don't know how I culd survive without my mum's masala pomfrets - fresh from the sea!

The most prestigious address in town - at one time
Seabird bandstand. At one time this was the most prestigious address in Bandra. The only building with a swimming pool where sadly one of the lads from my neighbourhood drowned more than 15 years ago.

That's one of the things that gets me about India. It's laxity. People are allowed to build things but not held responsible for consequences arising out of them. If Seabird had a swimming pool shouldn't they have been forced to have a life guard on duty at all times if people were using the pool? Things have always been cheap in India - it's a tragedy when life is too.

Windmere
Enough of the serious talk. Windmere is another building along the seaface that holds many fond memories for me. Of zonals, of music practice and more.

This is where Liesl a dear childhood friend of mine and her family lived in a a wonderful duplex apartment that was bang in front of the Arabian sea.

I can imagine Liesl waking up every morning to the salty breeze of the sea gently wafting through her hair. As I've often told her, it must have been the reason why it turned out so frizzly!

Tiny Tots with Guardian Park
A little park has sprung up at bandstand on the promenade - it's called Tiny Tots with Guardian park. I wonder what happens if tots turn up without guardians. Do they get turned away at the door. With the security guard yelling after them"...and next time bring ya guardian with ya...ya hear me!"

Arvind Gandhi Central Park
By the side of Tiny Tots park is Arvind Gandhi park. I have only question - who is Arvind Gandhi? And why does he have a park named after him? Why not a son - it's a lot more personal - and fulfilling - I'm sure.

I have half a mind to take over my own small patch of grass and under cover of night plant a sign that says "the patrick dsouza memorial spot." I bet people are doing that all time anyway. How else can you explain all the parks we have named after people we've got no idea existed? Have you ever thought about that - and why if there is a park that's going to be named - it shouldn't be after you...?

11:36 - the isiotonic salts have started to work
This is a hot country and only one soft drink has isotonic salts to help quench your thirst. Being a sucker for advertising - particularly that which was created when I was living in Mumbai - the pull of a Limca is too much to resist. Adequately refreshed I will now go about the rest of my day and write about it when I get back online which will be tomorrow.

Till then have fun!

Mumbai musings: day one of a trip long overdue

2009-08-28T05:08:00.000-07:00

Initial observations
The cost of an auto rickshaw fare from Bandstand to the station is still ten rupees, a second class ticket from Bandra to to Churchgate is still only six rupees, but a bottle of Kingfisher beer sets you back 75 rupees. The country really needs to get its priorities right.

Rainy season
There has been no rain though and that has been a bit of a worry. Oddly enough I came here for the rain – which I haven’t seen for 5 years. Most people would view a person with my motivations as crazy. Not really. The monsoons are simply beautiful – like the brush of an artist they transform the city’s canvas from brown to green. They settle the dust, make the Earth smell fragrant again and are so thoughtful even give Mumbaikers – at least one opportunity to avoid work or school due to flooding or the halting of the railway lines.

None of that this year though so hope it changes soon as I am here for only the next two days – three if my boss is in a good mood and clears an extra day leave over email.

Internet cafes
There is a dearth of internet cafes though I’d have to stay and Indians really need to wake up earlier. The only one in Bandra is near St Peters Church and it opens only at 10 o’clock.

I woke up at 6 today, finished breakfast (fresh hot gootli’s with Amul butter, cheese and tea the way only mummy makes it!), my hour of daily exercise and rocked up at 9 and it still wasn’t open. I spent the next 1 hour wandering around old haunts waiting for the owner to unlock the door.

Somnath lane
Went down Somnath lane, a lane I often used to walk through to go to school – to enter by the “small” gate. It used to be a tip – a really poor part of town that you never really went to. I did because it was a shortcut to school and I was almost always running late. Well you wouldn’t believe the difference now. The street is covered in a beautiful canopy of trees that makes it quite magical – an unplanned reprieve from the dust, din and cars of Hill Road only a few meters away. Some one has had the bright idea of paving the front section of the lane with cobble stones. That gives it a wonderful village like character as you walk through. I was impressed until I reached the school gate and realized it was closed!

Old school
So I made my way around St Andrews road to get to my old school. They’ve cut the playground into two sections – one is grassy and wild the way it should be – full of uneven mounds that will guarantee you will sprain your ankle playing football; the other unnaturally flat and trim. I am guessing that this is the section (the flat, trim one) that is given out for weddings every weekend – a revenue stream the school discovered about 10 years ago and has leveraged ever since. Nothing wrong with this at all of course unless it infringes on the right of students to have a place to play!

The old institution still hasn’t lost any of its grandeur though. It is still the most beautiful stone building I’ve ever seen. It’s over 100 years old and still churning out the best and brightest (as I’d testify – and you’d expect me too being a previous student – ahem!).

5 pm – time to get ready for the evening
It’s 5 o’clock and I’ve got plans this evening. I always do – I’m in Bandra – the place that I call home! This evening I am meeting up with an ex boss of mine from Ogilvy and Mather. We haven’t met for 15 years eve since I first left India. It should be fun and I am looking forward to it – there’s 15 years of stuff to catch up on!